Lexington, KY - Gone are the days of impeccably dressed wives greeting their guests in frilly, lace trimmed aprons, menus with tomato aspic rings and cheese fondue, and men sipping scotch while talking politics by the fire. Today's entertaining at home is far more attainable, freeform and satisfying.
Although the idea of hosting a dinner soiree or a Saturday brunch may sound appealing, the notion of cleaning, cooking and playing host can be quite overwhelming. Despite our demanding schedules and tightening budgets, how do we recapture the essence of hospitality in our homes? Here are 10 ways to do it successfully:
Don't Break the Bank
It is important to set a budget prior to inviting your guests, considering the number of attendees will affect your overall cost. Determining your budget will help you decide what style of event to host and what food to serve. It will also help remove the temptation into luxury that you cannot afford. Set a budget and stick to it.
What's in the Pot?
Are you planning a dinner for four or an affair for 40? Smaller gatherings allow you to plan a menu according to the dietary restrictions of your guests. Larger events require a variety of foods and beverages to meet everyone's needs.
Your company does not expect to be fed rack of lamb, truffle mashed potatoes and a vintage bottle of wine. Sharing a meal you feel comfortable cooking will make the notion of entertaining much less intimidating. My most memorable meals have centered around simple fare and great conversation. The food can be as uncomplicated as arranging platters of breads, cheeses, dips, olives, fruits, vegetables and chocolates for guests to graze on.
Aside from beer and wine, flavored iced tea or sparkling water is a thoughtful addition for non-drinkers and designated drivers alike. Have bottled water handy for large gatherings and filtered water available for small dinners.
When planning a full meal, consider the amount of cooking required. Chop, marinate, assemble and mix ingredients ahead of schedule. Many recipes can be prepped days prior and finished just an hour or two before your company arrives.
Rule with an Iron List
Make lists. Grocery lists, cleaning lists, to-do lists. Several party-planning Web sites offer free checklists online. Evite (www.evite.com) provides an excellent guide that allows you to organize your event from three weeks out to 15 minutes before the doorbell rings.
I have attempted, without success, to grocery shop, sweep floors, decorate and make food, all while yelling at my kids, making my husband feel guilty for not helping more, and pulling my hair out in a frenzy. Word of warning: this tactic does not work. Finish as much of the cleaning, cooking and decorating ahead of time. You and your household will be grateful.
Full Theme Ahead
Use your own interests to create a fun, memorable experience for your guests. The party possibilities are endless. Are you a movie enthusiast? Host an Oscar party this season. Do you enjoy playing video games? Consider hosting a Wii tournament.
My husband loves brewing beer, and this year we hosted a beer tasting featuring his gold winning brown ale. Over 30 friends filled our home for a fun afternoon of music, food and beer sampling.
A cozy Saturday morning brunch, a late night dessert buffet or an outdoor cigar night are just a few simple ideas to add interest to your next event.
Get in the Mood
Lighting and music are essential elements of entertaining and incorporating these will add enormous impact.
Select music that not only reflects the mood you are creating but will also put you and your guests at ease. If your CD collection is limited and you have yet to jump on the iPod bandwagon, visit your local library where you will find an extensive collection of music to set the tone for a great event.
Candles and other soft lighting will instantly turn a basic dinner into a special experience. Soft lighting adds an element of elegance and intimacy to your meal that cannot be replicated any other way. I recommend lighting unscented candles, especially around the dining room and kitchen. Candles that are heavily scented can quickly mask the aromas of the delicious meal you have prepared.
It's All in the Details
The difference between a good event and a great event is in the details. Is your kitchen properly equipped with napkins, plates, glasses and silverware? Do you have enough seating for guests? Are your camera batteries charged and ready to capture great photos? Where will you put coats and purses? Giving thought to such small details will ensure a more relaxed and stress-free time.
Think beyond your main entertaining space as well. Make sure your bathroom is stocked with the essentials and take a peak in your medicine cabinet to make sure you clear out anything that may embarrass you later.
I always try to have bug spray and sunscreen handy if we will be venturing to the backyard or out on the deck.
Also consider keeping a small stash of cleaning supplies nearby for any unforeseen spills on your carpet or sofa. It is advantageous to have stain removal and towels easily accessible rather than rummaging to find them during your party.
Every Little Bit Helps
When a guest attempts to help clear the table or pour drinks, let them. People feel more welcomed to your home when they can contribute. If someone offers to bring something, I often suggest they bring a bag of ice. It's cheap, easy to pick up on the way, and is always nice to have on hand.
It's Not about You
I have known many people who use entertaining as a chance to show off their designer dÈcor, amaze their guests with gourmet meals, and give the appearance of a perfect home.
On the flipside, many people refuse to entertain at home because they lack space, nice furnishings or cooking skills. Both notions are contrary to the true meaning of hospitality. Opening your home to others is a rare opportunity to bring people together in a warm, gracious environment. Remember that inviting someone to your home is a chance to get to know them better. Ask questions, engage in conversation and let guests know you appreciate their company.
Roll with the Punches
No matter how well you plan, things can go wrong. Even if you just charred the meatloaf, let it go. Cheerfully announce, "Let's order in Thai food," and enjoy the rest of the evening.
Obsessing about the rock-hard biscuits or the soupy mashed potatoes will only make your guests feel uncomfortable. Bring humor to the situation and move on.
Don't Forget: Enjoy Yourself
Planning any event can be draining. Be sure to pamper yourself before guests arrive with a warm bath or a glass of wine. Taking time for yourself will allow you to greet your guests feeling refreshed, relaxed and ready to entertain.
At the end of our lives what is most important are the relationships we develop and build upon in the time we have. Rediscovering the art of entertaining is certainly one of the most significant ways to live a fuller and more outward focused life.
Megan Smith
is a stay-at-home mom, a business owner and a part-time writer.
She blogs daily at www.ittysmitty.com.